My relationship with my biological father was never an easy one. As his not-so-perfect daughter, I could never make him proud or pleased at my (few) accomplishments. This carried over well into adulthood as I did everything possible for him to take notice of how well of a citizen of society I had become. Granted, my achievements weren’t Noble Prize worthy, but they showed just much I had matured from the young child I once was. I am the woman today I was destined to grow up and become. Still, this wasn’t enough for the overbearing and overprotective father of mine. College, good paying jobs and a loving family weren’t enough for high standards.
It wasn’t enough for him to just let me be happy with letting me make my own choices. He wanted me to become him and make his choices; that wasn’t the road I wanted to take in life. I didn’t want to be him. I wanted my own life. My choices in life led me to be where I am supposed to be in life. Good choices or bad, I was still shunned away from him and his life.
It took me years, but after realizing I didn’t need his permission to live my life my way, I knew that I had to make a choice on choosing my own happiness or living for his happiness. The day I decided to let go of my father completely, I felt a huge weight had lifted off of my shoulders. Many holidays had passed, even Father’s Day, and I have yet to have any contact with him.
I still love him, of course, but that doesn’t mean I have to waste my time or energy on something that is only going to keep me from succeeding in life and achieving all that I can.
“Freedom consists not in doing what we like, but in having the right to do what we ought.” ~Pope John Paul II
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